Cleveland’s Area 51

If you believe Cleveland’s Action 19 News, you get the distinct impression that there is something supernatural going on around Cleveland. It seems that we now have our own “Area 51,” an area where there are more unexplained UFO sightings than other areas.

Last week, it was the “Lake Erie Monster,” Cleveland’s answer to the Loch Ness Monster. Lake Erie’s monster is reportedly about 30 feet long and has gone undetected by scientists for almost 100 years. The really funny thing about this is that Lake Erie is teeming with walleye, which tend to mass into large schools during mating season.

I have a hard time understanding why they pull stunts like this. It can’t be for the ratings, as they are hopelessly mired in the Arbitron cellar. It seems as if everyone in the Greater Cleveland area is laughing at WOIO (please note “laughing at” rather than “laughing with”). Why don’t they just get The National Enquirer to do the newscasts?

An alternative, possible explanation: perhaps the UFO’s are looking for the Lake Erie Monster. Perhaps the Lake Erie Monster is really E.T., who phoned home.

Or maybe aliens are simply looking for a nice walleye dinner, for which, I hope, they have a decent recipe.

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