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Well we don’t give a damn ’bout the whole state of Michigan,
the whole state of Michigan,
the whole state of Michigan.
No we don’t give a damn ’bout the whole state of Michigan,
‘Cause we’re from O-HI-O!

The Random House Collegiate Dictionary defines a wolverine as a stocky, carnivorous North American mammal of the weasel family. Pretty much sums it up.

Is it just me, or has anyone else noticed that all the local trees are bent toward the northwest? There’s only one explanation: Michigan sucks.

I heard recently that you never see a nativity scene in Michigan during Christmas season. That’s because they can’t find three wise men and a virgin.

A Michigan grad came to my door the other night; I paid him for the pizza.

In Arabica the other day, I noticed a Michigan grad using his laptop. How did I know he was a Michigan grad? Simple: he had white-out all over the screen.

Visiting the UM web site the other day, I noticed a course description for a public speaking class; the subject for the entire course was a single sentence: “want fries with that?”

OK, so enough blather. I’ll leave you with this thought: what, in nature, has the colors of “maize and blue”? The short answer is: nothing. The long answer is: Absolutely nothing. Even blue jays have enough sense to color themselves with white, gray, and black instead of yellow.

OK, that given, how many items in nature are scarlet, or scarlet and gray? I’ll start you off with one: a cardinal (the bird).